Sitting here...

With 20 minutes to go before I have to get ready for work, I am sitting here trying to knock things off my to do list.
Have you ever hid something so well that you hid it from yourself? You dont know whether to say "Good Job idiot now you cant find it!" or "wow I am really good at hidding things".
Anyway I think looking at the calender and staring at the words "Vacation" which is coming closer and closer has made me lazier and lazier. I have no energy or enthusiasm to start my day....its ridiculous...however soon as I know I have a day off I get up like I have a job interview @ 6am...bright and early ..up and attem I am ready for the day.
Played a little racket ball the other day and I realised...damn I suck...well I dont feel too bad cause Hubby isnt the greatest player as well. So it was comforting to know I wasnt the only embarrassment in the family.

I am hoping its a slow night at work...I am truly not in the mood..I have become just like one of my collegues who was awaiting her vacation time to Hawaii...she had a "I dont give a rats ass" look on her face for 4 whole days before her vacation kicked in...her report was vague and contained only the basics. But I understood her feelings. I understood that in her mind's eye she could see the sun, and sea and smell the salt water and feel the sun rays on her body, and then she would open her eyes and she would hear someone call for "Nurse of room 13", like she didnt have a name and feel the chill from the central air, which is always on 50 frigging degrees cause everyone and their mother is having hot flashes and can see the chaos of people running back and forth trying to get sh*t done before the end of their 13 hour grueling sh*t fest of a shift.
I understood her feeling...and I think I am there now.
I am where she is and I am trying to hold on to the image of sun, sea and sand.
I am trying...